Love Matter, Love Matters

Ahhhhh love.

It's beautiful thing isn't it?

It's all about holding hands, kissing and getting hot and heavy.

At least, that's how it's portrait in Hollywood movies and the likes.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV) begs to differ.

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Every time I read this chapter (not that I read it a lot), I'll go, "impossible."

This is literally God-like standards unachievable by human. BUT Jesus proved that it is possible. You may argue that he's Godsend or just a fictional character but it wouldn't be half-bad following his example, yea?

My love story is equivalent to the love in a game of tennis. Zero. Nil.

I've always thought of myself as a person proud of his status.

Single.

"I don't need another woman in my life. Having two to deal with is already bad enough!"

Ahhh....sweet not-so-distant thoughts. Guess I've grown out of that.

It's nice isn't it? Being in a relationship. Having someone to laugh with. To share with. To fight with. To venture with. Alas, as nice as it would be to have a partner, the time has yet to come. Why? I have many reasons actually:

1) I've long decided to trust in God's timing. Which leads to number 2.
2) I believe that God will provide without the need for me to lift a finger.
3) Can't be bother (refer to number 2).
4) I'm still too young. Spiritually.

How does being spiritual-mature links to being in a relationship?

I don't know. Dammit! I don't know.

I guess it just wouldn't sit right with me. and God. Right now I am still going through a period of growth and self-discovery. I'm guessing being in a relationship would just screw things up. But when the time comes, I pray to be ready.

Ready to fight and defend what's important to me.
Ready to make sacrifices.
Ready to endure the many hardships and heartbreaks.
Ready to love.

Love is not a game played by kids but grown ups. MEN.

May I be a real MAN by then.

As beautiful as the love between boyfriend and girlfriend / husband and wife may be, I still think that Jesus' love for us is the ultimate.

We curse him, we mock him, we use his name in vain. Yet he still chose to forgive us, to die for us, to love us. Have you ever wrong someone so badly but was forgiven not because of anything else but love? Let me repeat that. Have you ever wrong someone so badly but was forgiven not because of anything else but love?

Not because you apologised.
"Aiya, he said sorry already so nevermind la!"

Not because of that nice gift you bought for her.
"Aiya, he spend so much money to buy this. I'm sure he's sorry lorr!"

Not for the sake of your friendship.
"Aiya, we friend so long already. Funny after wards if we're not friends anymore bahhh."

Not even because, "I'm your parent. Therefore, I'm oblige to forgive you."
(at least, that's how I think some parents would think.)

But because of love.

Whoa.

Whoa! That's something else isn't it?

Dare I say, I want to love like that. I want to love like Jesus. Now I just feel sad cause I know that's not possible. HA! I just contradicted myself right there and then. Anyways, if there's someone we're striving to be, why not Jesus?

It's a high calling. A very high calling. But teach me to love like you do. To love my family and friends. Even those whom I'm not fond of and even those who irritates me.

Teach me to love like you do. AMEN!~

Well, that's my love matter and this is me signing off says, "Love matters!".


~ faith, hope and love; the greatest of these is love ~

Oh no, a Filler

Haven't been in the blogging mood lately. But here's what been happening of late.

The video that I made last month is finally up for voting:
http://www.rmit.edu.au/mathsgeo/studentvideocomp

Vote for Geomatics! Vote for me! Julian Tay, 'Follow The GPS'.

Voting closes by the 30th of October. So get all your friends to vote too. Remember, the 1st prize winner gets a camcorder! (And I want it!)

The past week was "rest" week. Stayed at home and rediscovered the joy of watching anime. I love those comedy ones. Always gives me a good laugh. Could anyone recommend me any good comedy shows?

Been wanting to shop for some b-boy clothing and a proper beanie. With my head shaved, I think a beanie would sit pretty nicely now. After watching a friend's performance last Saturday, I'm feeling rather pumped. Gonna practice more and maybe even get the windmill down by the end of this hols.

Mentoring sessions came to a close on Saturday. It's been an amazing 10 sessions and now it's time for me get things rolling. This is a pretty big "rock" for me, so it's definitely gonna take some time before I get it to roll. I've got a gut feeling this is something I'll be working on for the coming months or years. I won't be able to mentor anyone if I'm not capable of taking care of myself first.

The trial run for Project Clockwise has been entertaining to say the least. It's good to see that my drumming skills is still mada mada dane and capable of generating remarks such as, "What were you thinking!". This means that I suck and I can only get better from here on out. Our last session will be on tonight but I'm definitely looking forward to it again next year.

This week, I'm gonna be a little more productive. Gonna go job-hunting. Do some shopping. Maybe a little cooking. And wrap up the October Issue! I'm way behind schedule but I think I can get it done by the end of the week. There's a whole list of other things I wanna do but there's no rush. It's gonna be a long holiday, so I can afford to take it easy.

That practically sums up what's been happening for me.

Wooo, last week of uni for most peeps. Have fun! Uni rocks ma socks!


~ Love Matter, Love Matters........on next ~

Bipolar Disorder

It amazing how fast I was able to overcome this issue that's been bugging for months. With just one conversation, it's gone. Amazing. Simply amazing. Thanks, Chris. I thought that I was doing you a favor but you ended up doing me a favor. So, thank you.

You're probably lost and a little confused about what's happening but that's alright. It's for me to know and only me to know. Ha! Talk about a complete 180 within a span of.......less than a day!

Ok, I guess I got some clearing up to do. It's a girl problem. Technical, it WAS a girl problem. (No no. Nothing wrong with the girl. It's just me.) And I think the problem resolved itself within me. You could say I faced it unknowingly and suddenly chains are broken and hearts are transformed. I guess I've finally come in terms with the situation that I'm in.

Amazing. It feels like a burden has been lifted off my shoulders. I wonder. Is this one of those temporary highs? Nahh, couldn't been. But we'll see.

Sorry guys, what I posted earlier is now void. At least around 70% of it.

BUT

I'm a guy with lots of issues. So, still be anticipating some big thoughts, questions and self-discovery, just without the emo-ness attached.

So much for "materializes into coherent words". Give me a day or two. I'll try to clear things up by then.

If I can.


~ weird, totally weird ~

The Price of Freedom

With the 'holidays' here, I think I finally have the head space to just sit down and blog about the things that's been bogging me. I've been trying to do this for the past couple of weeks to no valid. But with no more schoolwork pestering me, I think I can do this.

I always have to remind myself what the purpose of this blog is:

This blog was created with the purpose of sharing my life's journey, to document my 'profound-moments' and as a place for me to express my interests and thoughts openly and truthfully. May this blog be one which marks my pursuit of my true self.

BUT

it's more than that.

I am the type of person who tends to keep his thoughts to himself. That is why I challenged myself this year to be more expressive, more honest and at the same time doing so with integrity. As I learn to share openly, I have discovered more about myself. Those thoughts and emotions which I am unable to describe in the heat of the moment, later materializes into coherent words in this digital space.

Truth to be told.

Lately, I haven't been honest with myself. I've been waving away thoughts and issues that's been coming up over and over again. Dismissing them as insignificant with the excuse of, "Oh, I can deal with it later." when the truth is, I'm afraid to face it.

Afraid of failure.
Afraid of judgment and isolation.
Afraid that I'm not strong enough to deal with it.
Afraid to even talk about it in this space that I've created.

Pathetic.

As much as I want this to be a fun blog, there isn't much fun now is there? Are you guys willing to bear with me? As I lay everything (almost everything) down before you. Ripping off the many masks I wear. Sealing off the many personae I assume. Wiping off that fake annoying smile which keeps creeping up my cheeks. Are you guys willing to bear witness to this? To shoulder the same burdens I do? Not that I could say or do anything to make you.

You may be wondering why I'm doing all this. I'm not too sure either.

But all I know right now, is that if I don't, these problems are gonna eat me inside out. It's gonna stop me right in my tracks and whatever progress that I've made so far will be for nothing. It's about time I set things right with myself.

This is me guys.
This is me as you are only able to see here.
This is me facing myself.




























This is the October Issue.


~ great, no backing out now ~

Heart It Races

UPDATE! Friday, Oct 16th, 2009

First year's over.....


First year's over.

at 6.40pm
________________________________________________________________________________________

Monday
SIS test (first blood)

Thursday
AGT presentation (too easy)

Friday
Physical Geo Class test (double kill)
Physical Geo Practical (triple kill)
AGT Portfolio (killing spree)
Physical Modeling Project (M-m-m-Monster kill!)

And so, it's the final week for this sem. Better yet, it's the final week of my first Year in uni!

To get me through this week, Vitamin Strings Quartet's epic rendition of 'Dare You To Move'.

This week is gonna be ta-no-shii. Right, neko-chan?

Neko: nya!~

Oh, great. I'm talking to a cat.


~ Hopeful and hoping for much much more ~

There Is No Charge For Awesomeness!

An article about punk:

http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/getback/144976/hot-topic-punks-in-a-fake-punk-world/

What do you think? Is punk dead?

Recently discovered something cool on Youtube.

Japanese comedy skits!



Youtube "Jinnai Tomonori" for more!
________________________________________________________________________________________________

With the end of the year approaching faster than a speeding granny, I reckon everyone's feeling the pressure. There's a cloud hanging over everyone's head.

A cloud of worries.
A cloud of uncertainties.
A cloud of confusion.
A cloud.

It's such a depressing state and the weather isn't helping at all. Fortunately, the weather seems to be getting better. Unless the forecast is tricking me. Melbourne's weather is as unpredictable as a slow moving grandpa.

I reckon most of us needs a break. To just stop what ever that we're doing. Step back. Take a minute to recompose ourselves. Before jumping back into madness.

Well, since you guys are already here, why not take a five minute breather. Watch the video or let the music soothe your soul.

Forget about your Chinese oral.
Forget about your Spanish Exam.
Forget about your worries and your strife.
Forget.

It's times like these that I feel most thankful. Thankful that I have God.

A God who provides.
A God who makes a way.
A God who's there.
A God.

Funny. I tend to blog at the most busiest of times. Guess I prefer blogging compared to doing my assignments.

Cherish the days you have friends, for yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the "present."

And they say you learn nothing from cartoons. hmph.


















~ thoughts and reflections coming up soon ~

Five Days in

and so much has already happened.

Went swimming with the dolphins last Friday. I wouldn't exactly call it "swimming with the dolphins" but more like "holding-onto-a-rope-for-your-dear-life-in-the-freezing-cold-ocean-water-as-you-look-around-spastically-for-that-big-blue-fish". Besides dolphins, we swam with seals too. Like "swimming with the dolphins" I wouldn't exactly call it "swimming with the seals" but "floating-around-in-the-middle-of-the-ocean-as-the-salted-fish-smelling-animal-swims-around-us".

Regardless of what I've just said, I had fun. Though I doubt the same can be said for Ian. Motion sickness is his kryptonite.







On Saturday was the mooncake festival. Bought latterns and mooncakes from chinatown. Discovered that they sold snowskin mooncakes in Melbourne. Sweet. Celebrated with a Western-Asian fusion dinner with Kel, Ann and Ian in the comfort of our apartment. Hung latterns outside the balcony cause we got a little too cozy watching tv, eating mooncakes and drinking tea (was suppose to go latterning at a park).





Wii-ed at Grace's yesterday. Played Raving Rabbids and Super Smash Bros Brawl. 100 vs games! A few hundred more to unlock every single character. Who knew playing for 5 hours straight could give you a killer headache. I love videogames.

And it's Monday! Minus the Lab exam which is scheduled on the 6th of November, I have two more weeks of uni till Year 1 is officially over. It's gonna be a very busy two weeks with tests to study for and datelines to meet. But after that, it's the holidays. Let's go for goal babeh!

Since Ninja's taking a vacation, I'll be in charge of Corner of Memories' music for the next couple of weeks. Mann that guy runs off like nobody's business. Oh wells. Expect some J-pop and some boom boom pow!


~ apricot and jasmine snowy mooncake ~

The October Issue

~ Look forward to it! ~